There has been quite some controversy this week about the “Slap heard around the world” on Oscar Night 2022 when Will Smith slapped the SPIT out of Chris Rock’s mouth. Now… coming from a home riddled with domestic violence, I would say publicly that violence doesn’t accomplish much. And I say it like that because I am an advocate for paddling the bumbum (only when necessary, as a last resort) is a viable option for discipline. To reiterate, stern assertive attention… not violence.

On the other hand, when Chris Rock in the guise of “a joke” insulted Jada Smith and Will walked squarely up and knocked the words back down his throat, I said to myself  “YIKES!!!!! …….. “Whelp, I guess he (Chris) won’t be joking about Jada again.” Gotta know he’s thinking twice about the timing and placement of certain kinds of jokes. Which could actually affect his ability to fly unrestrained “off the cuff” as he has undoubtedly done before.

People say: It was Will’s night, it was very stressful, aaaand… that there had been “priors” (bad jokes from Chris in the past) that may have, in my estimation, gone unaddressed, which probably was a source of contention between Jada and Will. I wouldn’t be surprised if she (Jada) tore him (Will) a new badunch for not standing up for her, I mean who wouldn’t? Number One: Don’t put the attention on me (in a negative light) when my partner’s well-deserved recognition is the reason we are even present. And Number Two: Don’t snatch the scab off of an unhealed sore in the public … WHILE CAMERAS ARE FOCUSED ON HIM, and I am right there next to him.

Many say, Will should’ve waited until after the ceremony to address dude, but in all fairness the joke was given to the world (on camera)… why shouldn’t the response also be? Aaaaand that’s how Will chose to address it. IF my man responded like that… I would have been, in the moment… embarrassed. But later on, it would be the best lovemaking of his life. And I would tell him “Damn baby… that’s what I’m talking about. You stood up for me in a way that no other man has.” I wouldn’t expect him to fight EVERY TIME someone says something crazy, but my hope would be that he maintains the same level of protection even when I am not around. Yes! Stand up for me. Why? Because I would do the same for you. Not in a “Whitney - Bobby Brown” kind of way. But I wouldn’t let a disrespectful action slide… Imma pull you aside (in a private face to face moment) and address it.

There is an unspoken rule in the houses of old, well in the community I hale from and that’s the “Momma look.” Imma set a standard, and not talk too much about it because it’s more about action than it is about words. (“Oh, keep it up and you’re gonna see what I’m talking about. TRY ME…”) And once the harsh correction has been done the look is a non-verbal “Shall we go there again?” The memory (and the heart to heart, #lecture) is what curbs the behavior. I would say: “Will has now set that standard.”

Unfortunately, I don’t think Will Smith will “live this down” for a long, lonnnnnnng time.

30 years from now or whenever the next Black male takes away the Oscar… it will be “Remember the last time this award was given … when Will pimp-slapped Chris Rock….” Man! I wonder if Chris now has PTSD. Those flashbacks have got to be a “mother.”