The clock is striking 12, and Cinderella’s dream is fading into a mist. And think we all have a little bit of “Ella” in each of us. There’s that fantasy vision of who we want to be and then there’s that person we see when we look into the mirror. How many of us can literally say, I am totally happy with who I am? I often say as a response to people’s “How are you?”… “I am soooo good, if I were any better there would be two of me.”

I’ve been at this SELF Development thing for many years and ya know what? I have still not “arrived” - let that be a lesson to everyone who thinks by buying a “DO BETTER” course and following a formula will get you to where you want to be. ITS A JOURNEY, one that takes a lifetime but which starts with a made up mind and one step, and another and another. (That’s mine, quote me if you like.) But only elements of what I’ve done right (and wrong) can be tiny pieces of what it takes to get you where you need to be and visa versa. Its crazy when you look at it… remember your parent (or teacher) saying “DO AS I SAY?” It took a certain level of faith and certainly trust to follow those directions and believe that everything would turn out right. And some of us “overly inquisitive” rebellious or hardheaded folks fought directions from authority figures because… we didn’t want to be told what to do. Whatever that meant for the individually, I can certainly say… there is most certainly a seat in the School of Hard Knocks with their name on it. As my elders used to say:

“A hard head makes a soft behind.” Which means if you are being called (by God, the Universe… or your destiny or whatever) to go down a certain path “for your making” you can either go willing or you can get beat every step down the path (if you choose) but one way or another …. YOU’RE GOING. The point is: We all have freedom of choice and guess what … The responsibility (and privilege) is that you get to choose. Just know, sometimes NOT CHOOSING is a choice. If that is your stance, what you get has nothing to do with LUCK but it will certainly out of your hands to control. So I’m saying it’s much better to CHOOSE one thing or the other if for no other reason you can track and tweak the result (and find what works best for you.)

Anyway… self development is an INTENTIONAL endeavor. For what I offer (4SELF) you get out what you put in #tailor-made experience. But the first decision you must make is that you are worth it.

I guess for the majority of my life, I have been so much better at DOING than being. The weirdest thing as I’ve been relentless in accomplishing the many visions I have had over the years to improve the community, families and/or individuals… I found out from try to discover SELF that my IDENTITY was based on what I did (and the accolades I received from “knocking it out of the park”) rather than who I am as a person. The problem there is, once your assignment is completed… you still don’t know who you are. In fact you feel less “important” or worthy because there is no more applause or recognition. I want you to ask yourself: “Who am I outside and apart from what I do?” And if you are like I was when asked, unable to give an intelligent answer… in fact I just stood there and cried… you’ve got some intentional SELF work to do. You may not be there per se… if you don’t know what your purpose is, or you have teens struggling with IDENTITY, they all do, or you’re coming out of a long term or toxic relationship… hitting a mid-life crises or even bout to graduate from high school - YOU’VE GOT TO … Know Thy SELF to get to the next stage.

Let me say it again, EVERYBODY NEEDS SELF DEVELOPMENT.

And a great place to start is getting 4SELF 101 and if you need a little Gre8tLife Coaching, CLICK here.