Monsters and Doors

Haunted Houses are fun right? You never know what you might find in the dark and cobwebbed rooms... creepy music, peeling paint, blood, and guts. Oooooo I shiver even now just thinking about it. Fun right... yeah, not so much when you live there. For the last couple of weeks we’ve been talking about the “house” of our body (mind and spirit), and the many rooms we have there that are filled with experiences that shadow our past, control how we think and act in the present and project themselves into our future and causes the “what if” type of fears. #Skeletons-in-our- closets that often torment us and keep us stuck.  

The huge misconception is that demons don’t exist... and that is why we lose, stay stuck, and aren’t progressing because you can’t fight (or exorcise) a figment of one’s imagination. To illustrate a common happening we all overlook:  

I knew someone... ok let me be honest, MY EX-HUSBAND, was afraid of the dark. When we were first married, he used to have NIGHTMARES. He’d toss and turn, and I would hear him laboring to call my name. And in the morning, I’d ask him... Dude, what were you dreaming? He said it was a dark figure (the devil) laughing at him and tormenting him AND HE COULDN’T WAKE UP. So, he would struggle to call my name so that I would hear him and wake him up. Creepy huh? And years later after we remarried (long story) I’d come home from hanging out with the girls to find every light in the house on... he was still scared of shadows and things that go bump in the night. Imagination, ghosts, or something moving in the night? Yes... all of it. Well, I can’t pick on him too much, I don’t like sleeping with my closet open.  

Speaking of doors, we’ve all seen those old scary movies where there was a huge creepy house with those long corridors that got longer and longer when the character was scared and walking through... There was always at least 1 room with a locked door – and the whole story was about finding out what was in there. And to tell the truth, many of us have had experiences that we’ve gotten through and refuse to go there again. So, we’ve locked the door (vowed to never reopen “that wound again”) and have gone on with our lives. But the problem is... there are demons (monsters) behind that door, which stay with you (subconsciously) until you deal with them – EXORCISE THEM.  

Let me give you a chilling fact... strong emotions that we let linger on and fester like:  

Anxiety, extreme fear, shame, envy or jealousy, lust, The Poverty Mindset, rejection, abuse, and extreme anger can open a door to monsters that can come in and control you. For instance, unforgiveness and anger morphs into, hatred, which morphs into wrath and revenge, and finally into... Murder. That doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re gonna “go postal” or Columbine... but most often people that have been emotionally attacked (where they felt like dying) often go on to do the same to others. My point is, when you experience emotional trauma (that you can't let go of) you open a “spiritual door” to monsters. Like Dracula, he couldn’t come into the house until the poor unsuspecting (and vulnerable) person invited him in (and then he had a “legal right” to dwell there.) Spirits, ghosts, and demons are the same way, it’s warm and cozy in that room... why leave unless forced to.  The problem is, they are there and will hinder your success and moving forward if you let them stay. Eventually, when the right circumstance presents itself, THEY WILL MANIFEST. And when they do, you will find yourself doing and saying things you didn’t intend to. Many of which, you can’t take back. Some people actually “lose time” and actually cannot remember what they did and said... if that’s you, it’s time to clean house. Now, I have to say... this is not something you can do by your ONESY. You must have help. So Imma give ALL of you an assignment. 1) Go back and read last week’s blog, it will give you steps to start. 2) Find someone (with credentials) to talk to such as a Therapist, Counselor, Life-Coach or a (real) Minister with experience in “deliverance ministry” to help you clean house and GET FREE and Lastly, Be Thankful that you have made it THUS far.  

And let that feeling of thankfulness and joy not only carry you into the rest of the holiday season but let it be the pathway for the rest of your life.  

Peace and love Anji 

Haunted House 2: The Ghost of Memories Past

Welcome to the 4SELF101 Haunted House blog series... MOOOOHAAAAHAAA HAAAAAAA... Today, I want to talk about the house of mind. In our mind, we have many rooms and there may be a memory for each room. Memories of the Good Ole Days (#BackInTheDay). Memories of Mom and the relationship (or lack thereof) you had with her. Rooms of good times, rooms of bad times, and the same for your father and every other relationship and experience you’ve had. I can imagine the many doors, remember the movie “Monsters Inc.” (Disney/Pixar, 2001.) Certainly, every highlight and every trauma has a door too.  

It’s sad to say but if you have never had an awful or horrifying thing happen to you... keep living. Life brings so much... The good, the bad, and the ugly. Things from the past, that are dead and gone often linger on, like ghosts from the past. And these things tend to clog our minds and affect what we think, what we do, and how we respond to people & things in our today world.  Ever heard the saying,  

“Watch your thoughts, they become your words; watch your words, they become your actions; watch your actions, they become your habits; watch your habits, they become your character; watch your character, it becomes your destiny.”  

― Lao Tzu 

Our minds are more powerful and more sophisticated than any computer that was ever built. So, the things we carry in our minds, we think, we meditate on, we speak (even self-talk), we manifest (create or draw to ourselves). We record the many experiences we have had, like a file on the hard drive of our mind. Let’s think of those files as rooms – kinda like the hallo deck on a Star Trec ship. Some rooms we visit regularly on purpose like “The glory days.” But other times we find ourselves just there... revisiting traumatic and hurtful times more than we should. With our hand on the door knowing what lies beyond our fear or pain-inducing moments, that had us trapped. These places are the ones we vowed to never return to... The crazy thing is once we actually got away, we didn’t demolish it, we only barred the door, and put a yellow “CAUTION: DO NOT ENTER” tape across the entrance. And does that stop us from entering those haunted and dark places over and over again (even subconsciously)? NO... Some of these rooms are too painful to enter... they hide roots of hurt, abuse, molestation, or the loss of a loved one. I get it, I do, but if that room affects every other room in your house, it must be dealt with AND CLEANED OUT! Ghosts, demons (and even MONKIES) are hiding … that cause you to respond to life, people, and even yourSELF in mind-blowingly unhealthy ways. Those roots, which you probably don’t know are even there produce rotten fruit that you eat, feed to, or throw at others. And rotten fruit stinks and attracts flies, worms, and parasites.  

So, if you are wondering why you attract the same old dirty dogs, friends that use and abuse you, and rotten circumstances... check your rooms.  

HOW TO CLEAN OUT YOUR DARK ROOMS 

I’m not kidding you, this may be the hardest thing you’ve ever done. But I promise it’s the pathway to a healthy, fulfilling, drama-free and happy life. 

1. TAKE THE TIME... (pause) to look over the milestones of your life. 

2. Journal: Capture in detail the events (even the tough ones)  

3. TOUGHEST OF ALL: Forgive those who hurt or abused you (Forgiving sets you free. It doesn’t say what was done was ok... it breaks the chain.) 

   Forgiveness only begins the cleaning process. But sometimes there are things you can’t move (or remove) without help. Sometimes time doesn’t heal, and no amount of yellow taped, barred doors or “positive thinking” helps. GET A THERAPIST, COUNSELOR, and/or LIFE COACH.  

4. During the cleaning, invite God into this place to spiritually sweep clean the dross, the cobwebs, and to bring back alive what killed in you. Besides, when the demons come a-knocking again, and they will, you will need a SuperNatural presence to answer the door and declare: YOU MAY NOT ENTER HERE!      

For more on “Monkies”, the power of forgiveness, and controlling your Thought Life, get your copy of 4SELF101 here.  

For help, as always, I got you! CLICK HERE 

Haunted House: Haunted LIfe

Halloween is fastly approaching, where Americans will dress themselves (and their children) in witches, wicked clowns, goblin costumes, etc and party the night away. Over 2,000 years ago on October 31st, All Hallows Eve, the Celtics believed that the veils between our world (and the spiritual world, sometimes known as the 4th dimension) became very thin. They specifically had dark and cloaked ceremonies where they sacrificed crops and animals to deities that would no doubt endue them with knowledge of the future and allow them to speak to the souls of their dear departed loved ones.

Although we Americans have tried to lighten the mood and sometimes dress in funny, cute, endearing costumes, exchange candy and have fun… don’t fool yourself to believe the original intent has just cease to conduct the real activities. Witchcraft (casting spells), demonic summoning and psychic activities still do continue. But in our world today… these things have become common place. Do you think people wait until October 31st to Halloween it up? Noooooo… now they just call it… being “spiritual”… A RELIGION. Why call it spiritual, because its spiritualism or deals with the spirit realm, which is very real, believe it or not.

Ever been to a haunted house? There’s something intriguing, even invigorating about not knowing what’s around the next corner. Bumps that make you jump, screaming and unnerving noises that makes your skin crawl… It can be very very entertaining. But if you knew something very real was lurking in the darkness just beyond your view was waiting to capture and imprison you, would you go that way or avoid it at all costs? Sometimes we’re the one in the horror movie, in a very dark house, walking towards the killer… saying “Whose there?”

In the next couple of weeks we are going to explore some Haunted Houses, primarily you’re own… and we will crack open our own closets and hopefully address a few dead and rotting skeletons of our own. So rock with me. Let me lay this foundation for you before I bounce…

You have heard me talk about us being 3 part beings. Many people believe, as do I, that we are Spirit, that part that comes from God that gives us life. We have a soul, the place where our Mind, Will and Emotions live and they live in our BODY, also know as a HOUSE. The old church people say, “One day this house will wear out and we will leave it and go onto glory.” In case that confuses you, that last breath at death is leaving our house and moving on to whatever is next. Glory, is that place where you meet God (I believe every RELIGION will get you there.) But what happens next will determine where you will spend the rest of eternity. I don’t know about you but I’m a little nervous about seeing my life played out for all eyes (in Glory) to see… and then being judged for it.

Our house, has many rooms. Think of it as being a mansion with a wing for your childhood, one for your teen time and another for your adult life. What might you find in your rooms, both darkness and light. What doors have you opened and allowed … spirits to come on in? And what walls have you built? Where have cracks and holes developed.

Clearly everyone of our houses need a little renovation. Some issues you can addressed through DIY (Do it yourself) efforts, but some things cannot. You may need professional help… whatever it is, lets clean house to get ready for the holidays.

Join me for the next couple of weeks as we tackle a little SELF renovation!

Inner Child 2: Home Sweet "Haunted" Home

7015 Lena was “home” during my growing up years.  Not much to look at, it was in “the county” of  St. Louis, a small town scarcely even heard of unless you lived there or nearby.  Diversity was just beginning, and we were one of the two black families (in the whole area) “lucky enough” to experience it. I can still hear racial slurs flying at me as I walked home from Dairy Queen. Momma, the queen that she was, taught us to strive to be better than that ignorance.

It took some time for this house to feel like home, I am quite sure it was haunted, lol. Not so much like Poltergeist, but I guess it was what happened there that continued to haunt me decades after leaving there. I used to have “Freddy Krueger” like nightmares that drew me back into the thick of things…until I addressed the demons and God healed me. A lil’ brick house, that was so tiiiiiiny I sometimes felt claustrophobic, and it was infested with roaches… (I shiver just thinking about it.) There is nothing worse than eating Raisin Bran cereal only to discover that the box said Kellogg’s Corn Flakes… Gross? (You have no idea!) Believe me “The Tent” was a very welcomed interruption to our lives. And the clean-up…**gagggggg** I can’t even tell you.

I shared a room with my super “BAD” little brother, which I mostly hated except for when Mom and “Pop” (my Stepdad) fought.  We held each other until the yelling and bumping stopped. (I’m semi-old now and I still jump when I hear loud noises.) The door in the kitchen… led down to the back door and out to the garage & back yard. But if you continued to the right, you’d descend into a pregnant scary darkness, that would chill you to the bone. You’d be smart to hit that light first, up by the kitchen door. The previous owner constructed the space into a commercial grade Sports Bar complete with padded leather stools, a pool table, a refrigerator, and wine bottle racks that were anchored into a mirrored wall behind the bar. I’m sure some serious $%@# went on down there… it just felt earie. There was a bottle on the rack that had what looked like a woman’s breast in it. I kid you not! With a signed certificate that said, “I John SoNSo can do anything I want to anyone on my property.” WHY DIDN’T WE CALL THE POLICE?!!! We were young children, and we didn’t know what to do… so we called our friends over who confirmed the incredulous site and we all decided to get give the bottles a proper burial in the backyard.

For me the best part of the house was outside. Going out to play was just what we did.  I mean, after doing homework and chores we’d just disappear until curfew (when the streetlights come on.) Raise your hand if you know somethin’ bout that! Under the pink honeysuckle bush, whose fragrance would fill our room as if calling me to herself. It’s where I’d go to get away from baby bruh. Nestled in the backyard where the fence met the back of the house, there was a space just Lil Anji sized that I’d crawl into and suck the honey from stems for hours. Other times kids filled our yard from all around to play tag, kickball, “Catch one, Catch all” and hide N seek, … but at dusk if you weren’t in the house or on your way home … “your ass was grass!” Lol, I can remember Ms. Kitty doing the rollcall: “Percy, Debra, Demetrius, Denise and Daryl !!!!!!!!!” and seeing the terror in their eyes for what was coming next.

7015 Lena was where I learned about loneliness, relationships, domestic violence and terror but it’s also where I have precious memories of dancing in the darkness (me and all my siblings) to the strobe-lit stereo speakers playing 70’s soul music.  It used to cheer up Momma, when she was depressed, which was often… she’d have a cigarette in one hand and a drink in the other.  Even in the dark you could see her blinking, blinking, blinking away tears. We were “house-poor” latch-key kids who often created things to do for entertainment like “beat boxing” (before it was popular) or play-fighting “in SLO-MO,” we’d play cards and board games or roller-skated to music in the garage.  Growing older we’d hang out in the front yard under the big tree (it’s gone now) or on the side lawn until 3am, it was safe to leave your front doors unlocked. It was cool as long as Momma knew where we were. She was super strict, and life was hard sometimes but she, a single parent did something I never could do … have the same home phone number (383-0465) the entire time we were there.  Remember the old landline phone in the hall with the circular dial? Ahhh now that was stability.  Oh well it was the best of times, and it was also occasionally… the worst of times.  

People say, “It’s not good to dwell on the past.”  But I say, do your own visit to the past… don’t get stuck there. Otherwise, how will you know where you’re going if you don’t know where you’ve come from. Certainly, who you were then has had an impact on the you of today. Visiting your “inner child” and writing down your own story is not only therapeutic but seeing things with mature eyes may catch something missed or change your entire prospective on things that have you stuck and unable to move forward. And dealing with old issues today, sets you up for a better, happier tomorrow. Don’t put if off any longer. And if you need some help…. as always, I got you. CLICK HERE.